Group Session (Nox's Building)

[Marta]

Marta looked at each one of them as they said they were her friend. Even Noah and Jackson. Marta blinked at that, but realized that what had bothered her before about not finding people attractive was changing. Even now as she looked at the pair, she found it hard to look away. She did, hoping no one else would notice her gaze had lingered or that her face had turned red. Sterling hugged her and then Gen did and as it happened, Marta began to cry.

Crying usually brought Splash to her, but this time Splash remained by the couch where she had been left when Marta had come to the middle to help Arabella. Marta knew this was different. She didn’t feel sad at all. She felt incredibly happy. ”Thanks friends. You don’t know how much I needed to hear that.”

Marta wiped her eyes and began taking notes on what to draw, but it was Sterling’s that gave her a good idea. ”Oh I can work with that!” she said with a grin.

[Hayden]

Hayden was glad to see all the kids getting along and working towards getting better. "Let's try again next week. If you guys need to talk I'm always here."

[Marta]

Marta watched as the group began to exit. They’d be heading to Kallisti soon probably, so most likely people would stick around for a bit. Marta waited for a bit, giving people a chance to leave before she approached Hayden. She had something to ask; something that really bothered her, and she thought he might be able to help.

Marta had known one thing for a long time. Ricky was very important in her support structure. He was so important that his removal from that would have meant she would have to fight the wolf and would probably lose. That had been the truth - until today. With the support of Elyse, Sterling, Hayden, and the Blackthorn kids, her support was now strong enough to withstand that. Still she was afraid and didn’t know how to deal with that.

She stepped closer, golden eyes gleaming in the light of the dojo. ”I want to ask you something,” she said , surprising herself that she felt I afraid to ask. She continued before she had a chance to respond. ”Are you ever afraid of being dangerous? Because sometimes I am.” she didn’t beat around the bush. He knew what she was and what she could become.

[Hayden]

Hayden was glad that Marta felt comfortable enough to ask him a question in private. It took guts and he was proud, considering he hadn't spoken to her alone at all yet. He pulled his knees up and wrapped his arms around them and thought about the question. "I don't know if I've ever thought about it. I don't have the same urges as you do. But I know a guy who is terrified of the monster, his words not mine, inside. He fights it everyday. And he messes up sometimes. What kinda information you looking for."

[Marta]

Marta sat down on the ground and pulled her knees to her chest. Splash came by and lay down next to her, and she place a hand on her head and began to pet gently. Tears began to fall and she wiped them clear with her other hand. ”I don’t know,” she said in response to his question.

It was true. She want sure what information she was looking for. She only knew what scared her. Her breathing hitched. She wasn’t afraid to cry in front of people. She had done so with Ricky, Elyse, and her therapist. She knew letting out the emotions was good. ”I just know that because of my issues and what I’ve experienced, it’s easier to forget who I am than most of those like me. I’ve made friends. Friends help remind me - keep me from the darkness. I’m scared. I’m scared of what will happen if I lose that. I haven’t lost control or anything. I just want to make sure I don’t. You say your friend sometimes makes mistakes, but I’m scared because I can’t afford to make mistakes. Mistakes mean people might get hurt and I don’t want to hurt anyone,” she looked down and spoke the words again in almost a whisper. ”I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

[Hayden]

Hayden chuckled. "He has the same problem. But he keeps people around him that know the problem and help him. And you are doing that too."

Hayden put his hand on Marta's shoulder reassuringly. "You have this fear inside, and that fear is going to keep you vigilant to your worries. You are doing to great. We can work on some calming techniques and I bet Nox could teach you some meditation and yoga that helps when things get harry." He knew it wasn't literal in a wolfkin's sense but it was still an apt expression. "He knows all about internal demons."

[Marta]

Marta allowed herself to cry even as she heard and understood Hayden’s response. The validation that she was doing the right thing helped. Marta felt his hand on her shoulder and she didn’t reflexively flinch. She was getting better. It seemed like he was saying that the fear was okay. Not that it felt good, but it would keep her vigilant to herself.

Marta cried for a few more minutes, letting the emotions work through themselves. She finally wiped the tears away. ”The fear is okay? Like a reminder?” she said, trying to make sure she understood. She had lived in fear for a long time, but it had always been something bad and directed outward. ”You really think Nox will want to help me?”

[Hayden]

"You are doing great Marta."

Hayden laughed. "Nox will most definitely help. He can't say no. And he can't say no to family." Hayden pulled out his wallet and sent Nox a text.

Elyse's packmate Marta is looking for some techniques to quell the beast inside. Told her you'd help -- meditation/yoga sorta thing

He smiled at Marta "I sent him a text, when he gets back he'll get in touch with you or Elyse. This way you don't have to reach out to a stranger. He's a good man, he can help with techniques to add to your toolbox. But I think you have a great start. And Sterling and the others are all here for you too. They don't have your urges but they understand needing to support one another. And don't forget you are family even if you don't live here."

[Marta]

Marta smiled. Her support structure would get even stronger, and it really did help to be told she was doing what she needed to be doing. Nox wasn’t a stranger. Well he was, but they had at least seen each other. Marta wondered if Nox would remember. It wasn’t that long ago even though Mexico felt like a lifetime ago.

Marta moved closer and wrapped Hayden in a tight hug. This had really helped her. ”Thank you. I’ll look forward to next week and meeting with Nox. I’ll have a funny little comic for you to read too!”

She released the hug and stood up. ”Im going to check in with Elyse and then head to Kallisti with the other kids. Got lots of work to do. It was really nice meeting you!” she said it cheerfully. ”Come Splash!” splash complied and Marta waved to Hayden as she left. ”Bye!”

Marta had more questions, but she figured Elyse would be better to talk to than Hayden about them. After all, it would probably make Hayden uncomfortable to talk about her sudden interest in Jackson and Noah. At the very least, she’d have Sterling to talk to as well.