The tears building in Raffe’s eyes only made the decision to leave all the more right. He couldn’t watch Raffe in pain, and he couldn’t make watch Raffe watch him fall apart. It took all he had to walk down the steps and out the side door. The music from the club pounding to a comforting beat but Nox didn’t stop to listen or watch or even paid it much mind as he headed down the alley towards the tunnels. His heart pounded in his chest. Tears burned his eyes as they fell on his cheeks. The release of emotion raw and powerful in his chest. But he didn’t make a sound.
Everything he touched fell apart. His world had shattered, and he walked away. Nox reached through the grime covered power and grappled with the one tangible thing he could fight. The power raged inside, it tore through his body and he wanted to let it. Anger and hunger collided with one another. He was starving and the power pulled at the earth and Nox wanted to dump everything into the ground below. He wanted to let it burn him up, but that was giving up and he wasn’t about to let his feelings win, his demons weren’t every going to fucking win.
Nox pushed it away and collapsed against the nearest wall. Tears fell and Nox just let it all out. It was his turn to grieve.
***
The tears ran dry and Nox didn’t know how long he’d sat in the shadows. It was even later now and his stomach rumbled. Nox pulled himself off the ground and down the street. He wanted food. Needed food. Every other avenue of his outlets was out of the question now.
Nox headed for the nearest place to eat. It was a hole in the wall, barely open with barely anything of note to eat — mostly fried food and gross things that would make him feel even worse later, but he’d deal with that later.
Nox sat down at a table and ordered a burger and fries with a chocolate milkshake.
And then a second and third burger, he ditched the buns and just ate the burger and limp lettuce and tomatoes. His stomach still rumbled but his cash was thin. And he was nodding off as he ate. How long had he been up?
He grabbed a forth burger to go and headed for the nearest motel. He’d have to get with Sage soon and get a new wallet.
Sleep was next though — maybe a whole fucking week.
***
Without an alarm Nox had no idea how what time it was, what day. There was a knock on the door. That must have been what woke him up. Nox climbed out of bed and answered the door in the same clothes he’d been wearing when he left Kallisti. A courier handed him a clip board. ”Nox Durante?”
”Yeah.” Nox signed his name and took the box that came with it. ”Thanks.”
Sage being on the ball. Nox looked across the street and up and down the side of the motel and looked for any cameras. Finding one nested under the roof Nox gave the camera a wave and a nod in thanks and went back inside. Nox sighed as he opened the box and shut the door. Connected again.
The screen flicked on and Nox glanced at the time. It wasn’t even more than 8 hours. No wonder he still felt like shit.
Nox growled as looked at the empty recent call list. Nox wanted to send Raffe a text. But that wasn’t space and surely wasn’t even time.
But life went on. There were a lot of things he had to do and sleeping in motels wasn’t on his favorite things to do — promises he hadn’t fulfilled. Jobs he hadn’t finished. Obligations he needed to complete.
His stomach growled and his head was pounding. Food and more sleep were necessary, but that might not happen in that order or for a while.
He checked his schedule with Kallisti and check in the precinct since he’d gotten back. His mind reeled with all the things he needs to do — all he wanted to.
First thing he did was send Carmen a text.
Elyse is a good egg. She is like Kasun but in control always. Former hunter like me. Cuts the mustard for extra help in a pinch if the girls like her or not.”
Raffe had mentioned the refugees and there was a lump in his throat when he thought about losing the only place he had called home. He had to do that too, make amends there. He’d ordered deaths — that was going to be hard to handle if anyone remembered him.
So many things. Nox’s stomach rumbled again. Food first and coffee. Nox yawned, he was going to need that too.
***
Nox stopped at his storage unit where he kept all his dad’s old gear from America. Restocked some jerky and rations in his pack with some water and put the rest of his hunting gear sans the land warriors in their storage box. Salvation came with him, but Nox put Damnation back into the storage locker for the guns. He didn’t need the temptation so easy at hand. Took a lot more effort to hurt yourself with a knife than a gun. At least if you wanted to do it right. He’d given it thought a few times in his life, but right now wasn’t one of those times he wanted to even entertain it. He had enough ammo to hurt himself, but on weapon outside the power was still necessary for survival.
It was too early to hit the Almaz right now. But it wasn’t too early to scope the surrounding area out. Nor to late to find a safe spot to spend the next few nights in the tunnels. Sleeping in a bed was nice, but right now Nox didn’t feel like pampering himself.
His father would have made him sleep on the rocks without a sleeping bag if he’d broken a promise. The thoughts still fueled Nox’s own thoughts though he knew better. But it was his plan.
Nox looked on the lotus with a frown. ”What do I do with you Lily? Carry around the pretty flower or lock you in here with the rest of my treasure?” He sighed and sprayed the petals with water before wrapping her back up in air. He couldn’t leave her here anymore than he could have at Kallisti. His last hope to cling to.
Everything he touched fell apart. His world had shattered, and he walked away. Nox reached through the grime covered power and grappled with the one tangible thing he could fight. The power raged inside, it tore through his body and he wanted to let it. Anger and hunger collided with one another. He was starving and the power pulled at the earth and Nox wanted to dump everything into the ground below. He wanted to let it burn him up, but that was giving up and he wasn’t about to let his feelings win, his demons weren’t every going to fucking win.
Nox pushed it away and collapsed against the nearest wall. Tears fell and Nox just let it all out. It was his turn to grieve.
***
The tears ran dry and Nox didn’t know how long he’d sat in the shadows. It was even later now and his stomach rumbled. Nox pulled himself off the ground and down the street. He wanted food. Needed food. Every other avenue of his outlets was out of the question now.
Nox headed for the nearest place to eat. It was a hole in the wall, barely open with barely anything of note to eat — mostly fried food and gross things that would make him feel even worse later, but he’d deal with that later.
Nox sat down at a table and ordered a burger and fries with a chocolate milkshake.
And then a second and third burger, he ditched the buns and just ate the burger and limp lettuce and tomatoes. His stomach still rumbled but his cash was thin. And he was nodding off as he ate. How long had he been up?
He grabbed a forth burger to go and headed for the nearest motel. He’d have to get with Sage soon and get a new wallet.
Sleep was next though — maybe a whole fucking week.
***
Without an alarm Nox had no idea how what time it was, what day. There was a knock on the door. That must have been what woke him up. Nox climbed out of bed and answered the door in the same clothes he’d been wearing when he left Kallisti. A courier handed him a clip board. ”Nox Durante?”
”Yeah.” Nox signed his name and took the box that came with it. ”Thanks.”
Sage being on the ball. Nox looked across the street and up and down the side of the motel and looked for any cameras. Finding one nested under the roof Nox gave the camera a wave and a nod in thanks and went back inside. Nox sighed as he opened the box and shut the door. Connected again.
The screen flicked on and Nox glanced at the time. It wasn’t even more than 8 hours. No wonder he still felt like shit.
Nox growled as looked at the empty recent call list. Nox wanted to send Raffe a text. But that wasn’t space and surely wasn’t even time.
But life went on. There were a lot of things he had to do and sleeping in motels wasn’t on his favorite things to do — promises he hadn’t fulfilled. Jobs he hadn’t finished. Obligations he needed to complete.
His stomach growled and his head was pounding. Food and more sleep were necessary, but that might not happen in that order or for a while.
He checked his schedule with Kallisti and check in the precinct since he’d gotten back. His mind reeled with all the things he needs to do — all he wanted to.
First thing he did was send Carmen a text.
Elyse is a good egg. She is like Kasun but in control always. Former hunter like me. Cuts the mustard for extra help in a pinch if the girls like her or not.”
Raffe had mentioned the refugees and there was a lump in his throat when he thought about losing the only place he had called home. He had to do that too, make amends there. He’d ordered deaths — that was going to be hard to handle if anyone remembered him.
So many things. Nox’s stomach rumbled again. Food first and coffee. Nox yawned, he was going to need that too.
***
Nox stopped at his storage unit where he kept all his dad’s old gear from America. Restocked some jerky and rations in his pack with some water and put the rest of his hunting gear sans the land warriors in their storage box. Salvation came with him, but Nox put Damnation back into the storage locker for the guns. He didn’t need the temptation so easy at hand. Took a lot more effort to hurt yourself with a knife than a gun. At least if you wanted to do it right. He’d given it thought a few times in his life, but right now wasn’t one of those times he wanted to even entertain it. He had enough ammo to hurt himself, but on weapon outside the power was still necessary for survival.
It was too early to hit the Almaz right now. But it wasn’t too early to scope the surrounding area out. Nor to late to find a safe spot to spend the next few nights in the tunnels. Sleeping in a bed was nice, but right now Nox didn’t feel like pampering himself.
His father would have made him sleep on the rocks without a sleeping bag if he’d broken a promise. The thoughts still fueled Nox’s own thoughts though he knew better. But it was his plan.
Nox looked on the lotus with a frown. ”What do I do with you Lily? Carry around the pretty flower or lock you in here with the rest of my treasure?” He sighed and sprayed the petals with water before wrapping her back up in air. He couldn’t leave her here anymore than he could have at Kallisti. His last hope to cling to.
![[Image: nox_sig.gif]](http://thefirstage.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/08/nox_sig.gif)