06-29-2014, 12:43 PM
He was having trouble with this. His brain wasn’t working right anymore. At his wince, Aria’s smile widened. He tried to understand that. It didn’t making sense. Nothing did. Including the whole fucking universe. A dead son. A woman that he might be in love with a cold-blooded killer. Both of them able to use magic.
There was only one constant of his life. Loss. Whatever he wanted, whatever he craved, it was taken from him. You want a father? Too bad. You don’t get one. Even when he’s around, he’s not gonna be one for you. And then, when you’re 13, you’ll lose that too. Oh, did you like those grandparents? Yeah, sorry. Married to childhood sweetheart, huh? Nope, not in the cards. She’s gonna leave you for another guy. She realized that she didn’t really love you after all, even after all that time. And now you get to spend the rest of your life keeping your heart walled off. Your mother? I am sorry to tell you that she too will no longer a part of your life. Cancer’s a bitch ain’t it?
Heh. And your son, your dear son who was your life, who was your friend, your bud, who grew into such a great guy, someone you were proud of and thankful you had been privileged to be his dad. That little boy that you swore an oath to….For you Connor, the universe has decided to let you watch him die in agony in your arms. The screams and the tears will haunt you and you won’t be able to do anything about it.
And if you should finally get some semblance of your life back together after all that, some sense of normalcy, even of hope and of possibility, we are going to let you feel a connection that you haven’t ever felt since….not ever. She will consume you and you will finally see a glow of possible happiness in your future. But we will take her from you. But not with something as easy as death. No….for this it will be a living death. Because you will be tormented by her. You cannot escape her because you don’t want to escape her. But you also will be paralyzed by your fear of loss.
The Perfect hell. Welcome to your life.
This was his life. In that moment, the vast bleakness of it all stretched out infinitely before him, the all-encompassing future that he had been judged worthy of from the moment he was born. It was as if the fates or god or chance had decided that on the events in his life, he was going to be coming up snake-eyes every time.
Through it all, the din a cacophony of the fight went on in the background, but he barely saw it. He again became aware of Aria standing next to him. She’d answered him, he realized, and cast his mind back. Of course. Hunting. Made sense. And then she looked at him. "You done here?"
She didn't wait for an answer. She turned around and took his hand. "Someplace a little quieter."
He was done. And he didn’t care anymore. The feel of her hand was a connection to something. At least for the moment.
There was only one constant of his life. Loss. Whatever he wanted, whatever he craved, it was taken from him. You want a father? Too bad. You don’t get one. Even when he’s around, he’s not gonna be one for you. And then, when you’re 13, you’ll lose that too. Oh, did you like those grandparents? Yeah, sorry. Married to childhood sweetheart, huh? Nope, not in the cards. She’s gonna leave you for another guy. She realized that she didn’t really love you after all, even after all that time. And now you get to spend the rest of your life keeping your heart walled off. Your mother? I am sorry to tell you that she too will no longer a part of your life. Cancer’s a bitch ain’t it?
Heh. And your son, your dear son who was your life, who was your friend, your bud, who grew into such a great guy, someone you were proud of and thankful you had been privileged to be his dad. That little boy that you swore an oath to….For you Connor, the universe has decided to let you watch him die in agony in your arms. The screams and the tears will haunt you and you won’t be able to do anything about it.
And if you should finally get some semblance of your life back together after all that, some sense of normalcy, even of hope and of possibility, we are going to let you feel a connection that you haven’t ever felt since….not ever. She will consume you and you will finally see a glow of possible happiness in your future. But we will take her from you. But not with something as easy as death. No….for this it will be a living death. Because you will be tormented by her. You cannot escape her because you don’t want to escape her. But you also will be paralyzed by your fear of loss.
The Perfect hell. Welcome to your life.
This was his life. In that moment, the vast bleakness of it all stretched out infinitely before him, the all-encompassing future that he had been judged worthy of from the moment he was born. It was as if the fates or god or chance had decided that on the events in his life, he was going to be coming up snake-eyes every time.
Through it all, the din a cacophony of the fight went on in the background, but he barely saw it. He again became aware of Aria standing next to him. She’d answered him, he realized, and cast his mind back. Of course. Hunting. Made sense. And then she looked at him. "You done here?"
She didn't wait for an answer. She turned around and took his hand. "Someplace a little quieter."
He was done. And he didn’t care anymore. The feel of her hand was a connection to something. At least for the moment.