11-14-2014, 04:16 PM
Lucas threw back the shot. God it was so good. He'd forgotten that flavor, the burn down to your chest as it went down, the way your cheeks flushed and you took a deep breath and your heart kind of slowed and your mind sort of lifted just a bit, expanded just a bit, the edges becoming a little faded and you relaxed and wondered where in God's name this has been for the last two years, this sweet sweet drink that made life bearable, that chased away the pain and the memories, numbed them and dug a pit and buried them and you could finally have peace.
That first shot down he could look at the old man again, could focus and not feel overwhelmed. The guy was looking at him curiously and for a moment that familiarity came back to him. He'd gotten into a car with a man he didn't know. Just like he had so many times before. The though sickened him, knowing what that had meant. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror at the bar and saw someone he hadn't seen in years.
He felt himself go weak at the thought, tried to figure out what he was doing. Part of him knew he should go. Two years of being sober down the drain. But a part of him didn't care, now that he felt that relaxation. It said to stay. He could be careful. He wasn't the junkie he used to be. He ordered another shot of rum and sipped at it.
The man started to say something but he turned as a woman sat down. She was very attractive in that tight red dress and he found himself staring at her for a moment until she said something. Asked for a light.
Something woke in him. Guilt. Aria's face flashed to his mind. He got a hold of himself and answered her with an apologetic smile. "No, sorry. I don't"
He shifted in his seat so he wasn't facing the woman but not turning his back to her either. He felt trapped. He was starting to regret this whole thing.
That first shot down he could look at the old man again, could focus and not feel overwhelmed. The guy was looking at him curiously and for a moment that familiarity came back to him. He'd gotten into a car with a man he didn't know. Just like he had so many times before. The though sickened him, knowing what that had meant. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror at the bar and saw someone he hadn't seen in years.
He felt himself go weak at the thought, tried to figure out what he was doing. Part of him knew he should go. Two years of being sober down the drain. But a part of him didn't care, now that he felt that relaxation. It said to stay. He could be careful. He wasn't the junkie he used to be. He ordered another shot of rum and sipped at it.
The man started to say something but he turned as a woman sat down. She was very attractive in that tight red dress and he found himself staring at her for a moment until she said something. Asked for a light.
Something woke in him. Guilt. Aria's face flashed to his mind. He got a hold of himself and answered her with an apologetic smile. "No, sorry. I don't"
He shifted in his seat so he wasn't facing the woman but not turning his back to her either. He felt trapped. He was starting to regret this whole thing.