It had been a long time since she had felt kindness without any strings attached. She wasn't sure how she felt about that. Part of her knew that she should feel good about it, but it felt wrong. Only one had really ever treated her that way, and he was gone. He could never come back either. It felt like kindness should be reserved for him, and that accepting it from others was something that shouldn't happen.
She didn't tell them this. Honestly she liked that they were being kind. That made her feel a little guilty, but she buried it. They didn't need to hear about that. She didn't want to talk about it either. For awhile she didn't say anything, just kept her face buried in her hands with her eyes closed so she couldn't see the spinning room. She was thinking about actually going to see this club, but she didn't want this Nox guy trying to find her if she didn't want him to. She didn't trust him and couldn't even attempt to trust him unless she met him. She wasn't sure she wanted to meet him. But then Hayden said the one word that made the decision for her.
Family.
She cringed when he said the word, and then again when Ashton said it. They might have said the word before, but now that she was trusting them and she was hearing what they were saying clearly, she wasn't sure she liked that word. There was an offer there, an offer to be a part of a family again. She had only called her dad family. No one else could hold that title. He couldn't be replaced. Tatyana felt herself shaking a bit. She was feeling again now. Pain was radiating from her gut, even from her drunken state.
Tatyana had to bury it. She didn't want to feel it. Tonight was about forgetting. "Can I have another drink?" was all she said when she worked up the courage to speak. She needed to forget.
She didn't tell them this. Honestly she liked that they were being kind. That made her feel a little guilty, but she buried it. They didn't need to hear about that. She didn't want to talk about it either. For awhile she didn't say anything, just kept her face buried in her hands with her eyes closed so she couldn't see the spinning room. She was thinking about actually going to see this club, but she didn't want this Nox guy trying to find her if she didn't want him to. She didn't trust him and couldn't even attempt to trust him unless she met him. She wasn't sure she wanted to meet him. But then Hayden said the one word that made the decision for her.
Family.
She cringed when he said the word, and then again when Ashton said it. They might have said the word before, but now that she was trusting them and she was hearing what they were saying clearly, she wasn't sure she liked that word. There was an offer there, an offer to be a part of a family again. She had only called her dad family. No one else could hold that title. He couldn't be replaced. Tatyana felt herself shaking a bit. She was feeling again now. Pain was radiating from her gut, even from her drunken state.
Tatyana had to bury it. She didn't want to feel it. Tonight was about forgetting. "Can I have another drink?" was all she said when she worked up the courage to speak. She needed to forget.