Important Discoveries

[Nox]

Nox wasn't sure about the saving lives part but it would defintely be useful. And it did change the world. Though he was also pretty sure there was a veiled threat that went with it. If he told people, if his people told people, things might end badly. He would have to warn Emily and Jared. The rest were pretty much easily kept under control. Not that he was one to tell people what to do or not. He could only make the suggestion.

"That feeling never leaves. That ready to die." There was still the minor depression and the value of his own life that filtered through his mind and soul. He fought with it everyday which is why it had been better than the horde. "I fight the feeling nearly every day. At least with nothing I didn't have to fight the horde too. I have no control over the instincts, it overrides with primal instincts instead of logic and rationalization. Right now it's a dull hum, the horde, I barely feel it. I'm not sure why, it's different than before, but it's still there. Still tainting the source of our power, still a dull hum of noise. But I'm only days in and haven't had time to process much less deal with what I feel."

"It's a slow death only because you lack the will to live. Life is not the same. It's dull. Boring. It could break a weak person, and it will wear down a strong one. It was hard to make the feeling go away. I'm not one to induldge in drugs, but I was tempted. And suicide, well... That's far easier to think about. But I promised myself I wouldn't end like my father. And I'm nothing if I'm not a man of my word." The truth stung. He was nothing... he failed a promise, didn't keep it. He had his excuses. His reasons. And it stung everytime he said 'I promise' to anyone. How could he make that promise? How could he make any promise? He was nothing...