05-25-2025, 05:33 PM
There was something strangely poetic about finding Nox here. Alone, half-shrouded in neon haze and city dust, the red light district clinging to them both like bad cigarette smoke. Fitting, maybe. Like the universe had decided to vomit up one of Jay’s ghosts and set it shivering at the edge of the river.
The surprise on Nox’s face said enough. Recognition, hesitation. Regret, maybe.
Jay didn’t move. Didn’t speak. The cold curled into the seams of his coat, but he hardly noticed. He just stared.
A pulse beat hard behind his eyes. Anger, yes. And something worse. Something older. Something broken.
He thought he’d buried this particular betrayal deep enough that it wouldn’t rise again. Time had been merciful, if indifferent. Nox had become just another name in the back of his skull. Muted, shelved, nearly faceless. But here, now, a single look was all it took to rip the seal off. The pain. The fury. The ache. The loss.
Jay’s jaw locked tight as a bolt, and for a moment, he didn’t know what his body would do. Shove Nox over the railing and watch him vanish beneath the freezing surface? Grab him by the collar and drive a fist into his gut until they were both too exhausted to speak? Or, god help him. Just pull him close. Taste that old bitterness again. Let it burn through all this cold.
He stayed still. Like a statue carved for war, hands in his pockets to keep them from doing something stupid. Then Nox’s voice came. Soft. Dry. Too familiar.
"I can explain what happened that lead up to the events that went down the last time we saw each other. Or you can just beat the shit out of me again."
Jay didn’t answer. Not right away. And then, something changed. The sound that came out of him wasn’t quite laughter, but it was close. A sharp exhale, breath fogging in the air. For a moment, the tension in his chest loosened, but it didn’t leave.
He stepped forward, slow, like a man approaching a cliff’s edge. Not a threat. Not forgiveness, either. Just movement. Side by side now, he leaned on the railing, eyes fixed on the water below. Dirty. Sloshy.
“Nah,” Jay said, voice low, like it had been scraped across gravel. “Already hit my quota for the day. Hand’s fucked anyway.”
Silence hung between them like a noose on a windless night, waiting for someone to pull it tight. Jay didn’t look at him. He didn’t need to. His mind was already rewriting the past few minutes, trying to make sense of what he was doing. What he wanted. The synthetic cool of the drug still curled at the back of his throat, numbing everything but this. The truth was simple and ugly.
He didn’t want to hurt Natalie. But the peace he found with her felt like wearing someone else’s life. Too soft. Too real. Too good. And Jay had never been any good with good things.
Nox, on the other hand…
Nox was a wound that hadn’t closed. A ghost that hadn’t moved on. This might be the out he’d been looking for. And yet he said nothing more.
Just leaned there, shoulder to shoulder with a man that could help ruin him. Or save him. He didn’t know.
The surprise on Nox’s face said enough. Recognition, hesitation. Regret, maybe.
Jay didn’t move. Didn’t speak. The cold curled into the seams of his coat, but he hardly noticed. He just stared.
A pulse beat hard behind his eyes. Anger, yes. And something worse. Something older. Something broken.
He thought he’d buried this particular betrayal deep enough that it wouldn’t rise again. Time had been merciful, if indifferent. Nox had become just another name in the back of his skull. Muted, shelved, nearly faceless. But here, now, a single look was all it took to rip the seal off. The pain. The fury. The ache. The loss.
Jay’s jaw locked tight as a bolt, and for a moment, he didn’t know what his body would do. Shove Nox over the railing and watch him vanish beneath the freezing surface? Grab him by the collar and drive a fist into his gut until they were both too exhausted to speak? Or, god help him. Just pull him close. Taste that old bitterness again. Let it burn through all this cold.
He stayed still. Like a statue carved for war, hands in his pockets to keep them from doing something stupid. Then Nox’s voice came. Soft. Dry. Too familiar.
"I can explain what happened that lead up to the events that went down the last time we saw each other. Or you can just beat the shit out of me again."
Jay didn’t answer. Not right away. And then, something changed. The sound that came out of him wasn’t quite laughter, but it was close. A sharp exhale, breath fogging in the air. For a moment, the tension in his chest loosened, but it didn’t leave.
He stepped forward, slow, like a man approaching a cliff’s edge. Not a threat. Not forgiveness, either. Just movement. Side by side now, he leaned on the railing, eyes fixed on the water below. Dirty. Sloshy.
“Nah,” Jay said, voice low, like it had been scraped across gravel. “Already hit my quota for the day. Hand’s fucked anyway.”
Silence hung between them like a noose on a windless night, waiting for someone to pull it tight. Jay didn’t look at him. He didn’t need to. His mind was already rewriting the past few minutes, trying to make sense of what he was doing. What he wanted. The synthetic cool of the drug still curled at the back of his throat, numbing everything but this. The truth was simple and ugly.
He didn’t want to hurt Natalie. But the peace he found with her felt like wearing someone else’s life. Too soft. Too real. Too good. And Jay had never been any good with good things.
Nox, on the other hand…
Nox was a wound that hadn’t closed. A ghost that hadn’t moved on. This might be the out he’d been looking for. And yet he said nothing more.
Just leaned there, shoulder to shoulder with a man that could help ruin him. Or save him. He didn’t know.
Only darkness shows you the light.