09-06-2018, 11:06 PM
(This post was last modified: 09-06-2018, 11:12 PM by Jay Carpenter.)
Her lips parted as though about to speak only for them to muffle to silence. Anna Marie pulled back, sat straighter. The same way that she did when certain people walked by. A cat that sensed something on the periphery.
Jay followed her line of sight toward the entrance. A flutter of gold hair. Quick steps ushering swift exodus. His breath stopped. Blinked a few times. When he looked back at Anna, she was smiling that slim, coy smile like she grasped some victory he didn’t know was at hand.
Then it hit him, He suddenly sat straighter, pulling away from conspiratorial whispers as he did. Oh this looked bad. Or at least, it didn’t look good. Jay the great hero sweeping in to save the dying sibling, kidnaps the family and dumps them against their will while he was distracted by gambling and girls. He did warn Natalie that he was no hero. One of these days she’d believe him. Neither was he lying when he said he was a shit son. Aside from the typical teenage secrecies and empty promises for the future, he flat out lied the day after Thanksgiving about going with them to Des Moines. He used the chance to jump at escape without a moment’s consideration for the people that depended on him. Every step of the way since then was dishonorable.
A frown took him. He should probably go after her. Explain - explain what exactly, who knew? But give it a try anyway. He was no closer to deciding what to do for the immediate future, beyond the pending steak and potatoes. He had no plan. Even if he swore he’d figure something out. Probably another lie, but at least that was to himself.
He pinched his forehead when Anna Marie interrupted the pleasantly dark train of thoughts burning through his brain.
“Of course I trust you,” she explained softly. Trust radiating despite the way he treated her before. Guilt threatened to lodge in his chest before he forced the bolus on down.
Trusting him was a bad idea. Natalie was going to have to wait. It burned to make that call. But dammit, he had to know what Anna Marie knew. She worked at the hospital. She saw Diaz regularly. She had to know something about the Sickness. What Diaz intended to do with Cayli.
Blue eyes flickered the room quickly. The bartender was busy. A few other patrons mind their own business. Jay lowered his voice carefully anyway.
“Have Sickness patients been through? Did Diaz see them?”
Anna Marie was studying her martini glass like the pale liquid harbored the secrets to the meaning of life. Maybe it did. There was gin in it, after all.
He leaned around, uncomfortably near again, attempting to capture her eyes. Natalie had to have seen the way he leaned into Anna. It did look bad. She thought his allegiance to flags flickered with the wind? That was apparently nothing compared to the fickle captors of his heart. Not that he had a heart. He definitely didn’t. Useless, stupid things that made good men do stupid, foolish shit like get up and walk away from gorgeous ex’s that made it abundently clear they could get back together right then if he so much as hinted the word.
When she looked up, her lips were sealed. Jay had his answer. Whatever it was she knew, she was too afraid to put it to words.
Not only was he going to walk away from someone that held his heart since Junior High, but also from a really delicious looking steak that was just now coming down the galley and laid in front of him. His stomach practically collapsed in on itself.
A growl of frustration and slid from the seat. Anna Marie stopped him in alarm. “What are you doing?”
“Sorry, Annie, I’m really not the same guy you knew. I’m not the same guy I knew either.” The proclamation was cryptic. He looked at her one last moment.
“If you do remember anything about Diaz, let me know.”
Like the true gentleman that he was, he left her alone with two plates of food, half finished drinks, and the echo of bad company. He hurried out. Swinging this way and that for signs of gold hair and pissed off, pale gaze.
Expert eyes scanned. Nothing toward the casino. The hall was empty. Coffee kiosk abandoned.
He skid to a stop as he passed the club. The thumping of base drummed the inside of his head painfully. He’d not slept but in fits and starts on the plane and was practically held up by the force of adrenaline fossilizing his skeleton upright.
She sat alone, back turned. Pale hair rippled silk waves. He swallowed, wishing he’d finished that second shot before abandoning Anna Marie.
This was a bad idea. She wanted to be left alone. To drink and be alone. He didn’t blame her. The soft throb of a headache touched the inside of his skull. He needed sleep soon.
His heart beat in his chest so hard he was sure she’d hear it over the music. But he forced his steps forward anyway and folded into the seat next to her without meeting that pale gaze. Instead, he flagged the bartender and ordered the drink he didn’t finish from the competing place.
The shade of the hat cast shadows that hid his expression. If only the thing cast the same inside his head. Why was this so damn hard?
“Perks of a small town.” He said flatly. Town was an abstract concept out here. He thought about making a comment about her clean hair or change of clothes. Maybe the choice of venue or selection of liquor.
A message buzzed his wallet just then. Thankful for the distraction, he read the note from Cayli.
“Mom and dad are driving me crazy! Where are you?”
He tilted the screen toward Natalie like she might be in on the joke. He didn’t answer it right away. Instead, left it open on the bar in front of them.
“I uh, didn’t get a chance to thank you for what you did for her.” The sentiment toed the edge of dangerous waters. Had she gone through the Sickness too? Did she suffer? Did someone come to her rescue? The fire..
“Did you know— back in, uh, Freetown?” His chest tightened as he shifted his weight in the seat. Anomalies followed Natalie like her own horrible shadow. The remnants of an explosion in Netlands. The fire at the embassy. Did she use it on Pavlo when she escaped?
This time it was his turn to study the shot glass like it hid the secrets to the meaning of life.
Eyes heavy, brows low, his voice fell to a bare whisper. “I think that’s when I started.” He didn’t remember Sickness, but he remembered being off. Sweating. Then again, it was fucking hot in the jungle. Anxious? Well, that was hardly new. Did she know that Jay was the one that executed the General? Did she know that when he hesitated to pull the trigger it wasn’t out of mercy?
The taut line of his jaw parted just enough to swallow. Golden warmth blossomed from his chest. He took a deep breath. The things he said to Anna Marie were true. He was different. Even compared to a year ago. This power inside, whatever it was, changed people into something else.
Maybe that’s why he couldn’t fault mom and dad’s denial too much. No sane person should covet this power. Let alone witness it infect an innocent girl’s life ahead of her time. Cayli would be better off without this storm blighting her soul.
Jay followed her line of sight toward the entrance. A flutter of gold hair. Quick steps ushering swift exodus. His breath stopped. Blinked a few times. When he looked back at Anna, she was smiling that slim, coy smile like she grasped some victory he didn’t know was at hand.
Then it hit him, He suddenly sat straighter, pulling away from conspiratorial whispers as he did. Oh this looked bad. Or at least, it didn’t look good. Jay the great hero sweeping in to save the dying sibling, kidnaps the family and dumps them against their will while he was distracted by gambling and girls. He did warn Natalie that he was no hero. One of these days she’d believe him. Neither was he lying when he said he was a shit son. Aside from the typical teenage secrecies and empty promises for the future, he flat out lied the day after Thanksgiving about going with them to Des Moines. He used the chance to jump at escape without a moment’s consideration for the people that depended on him. Every step of the way since then was dishonorable.
A frown took him. He should probably go after her. Explain - explain what exactly, who knew? But give it a try anyway. He was no closer to deciding what to do for the immediate future, beyond the pending steak and potatoes. He had no plan. Even if he swore he’d figure something out. Probably another lie, but at least that was to himself.
He pinched his forehead when Anna Marie interrupted the pleasantly dark train of thoughts burning through his brain.
“Of course I trust you,” she explained softly. Trust radiating despite the way he treated her before. Guilt threatened to lodge in his chest before he forced the bolus on down.
Trusting him was a bad idea. Natalie was going to have to wait. It burned to make that call. But dammit, he had to know what Anna Marie knew. She worked at the hospital. She saw Diaz regularly. She had to know something about the Sickness. What Diaz intended to do with Cayli.
Blue eyes flickered the room quickly. The bartender was busy. A few other patrons mind their own business. Jay lowered his voice carefully anyway.
“Have Sickness patients been through? Did Diaz see them?”
Anna Marie was studying her martini glass like the pale liquid harbored the secrets to the meaning of life. Maybe it did. There was gin in it, after all.
He leaned around, uncomfortably near again, attempting to capture her eyes. Natalie had to have seen the way he leaned into Anna. It did look bad. She thought his allegiance to flags flickered with the wind? That was apparently nothing compared to the fickle captors of his heart. Not that he had a heart. He definitely didn’t. Useless, stupid things that made good men do stupid, foolish shit like get up and walk away from gorgeous ex’s that made it abundently clear they could get back together right then if he so much as hinted the word.
When she looked up, her lips were sealed. Jay had his answer. Whatever it was she knew, she was too afraid to put it to words.
Not only was he going to walk away from someone that held his heart since Junior High, but also from a really delicious looking steak that was just now coming down the galley and laid in front of him. His stomach practically collapsed in on itself.
A growl of frustration and slid from the seat. Anna Marie stopped him in alarm. “What are you doing?”
“Sorry, Annie, I’m really not the same guy you knew. I’m not the same guy I knew either.” The proclamation was cryptic. He looked at her one last moment.
“If you do remember anything about Diaz, let me know.”
Like the true gentleman that he was, he left her alone with two plates of food, half finished drinks, and the echo of bad company. He hurried out. Swinging this way and that for signs of gold hair and pissed off, pale gaze.
Expert eyes scanned. Nothing toward the casino. The hall was empty. Coffee kiosk abandoned.
He skid to a stop as he passed the club. The thumping of base drummed the inside of his head painfully. He’d not slept but in fits and starts on the plane and was practically held up by the force of adrenaline fossilizing his skeleton upright.
She sat alone, back turned. Pale hair rippled silk waves. He swallowed, wishing he’d finished that second shot before abandoning Anna Marie.
This was a bad idea. She wanted to be left alone. To drink and be alone. He didn’t blame her. The soft throb of a headache touched the inside of his skull. He needed sleep soon.
His heart beat in his chest so hard he was sure she’d hear it over the music. But he forced his steps forward anyway and folded into the seat next to her without meeting that pale gaze. Instead, he flagged the bartender and ordered the drink he didn’t finish from the competing place.
The shade of the hat cast shadows that hid his expression. If only the thing cast the same inside his head. Why was this so damn hard?
“Perks of a small town.” He said flatly. Town was an abstract concept out here. He thought about making a comment about her clean hair or change of clothes. Maybe the choice of venue or selection of liquor.
A message buzzed his wallet just then. Thankful for the distraction, he read the note from Cayli.
“Mom and dad are driving me crazy! Where are you?”
He tilted the screen toward Natalie like she might be in on the joke. He didn’t answer it right away. Instead, left it open on the bar in front of them.
“I uh, didn’t get a chance to thank you for what you did for her.” The sentiment toed the edge of dangerous waters. Had she gone through the Sickness too? Did she suffer? Did someone come to her rescue? The fire..
“Did you know— back in, uh, Freetown?” His chest tightened as he shifted his weight in the seat. Anomalies followed Natalie like her own horrible shadow. The remnants of an explosion in Netlands. The fire at the embassy. Did she use it on Pavlo when she escaped?
This time it was his turn to study the shot glass like it hid the secrets to the meaning of life.
Eyes heavy, brows low, his voice fell to a bare whisper. “I think that’s when I started.” He didn’t remember Sickness, but he remembered being off. Sweating. Then again, it was fucking hot in the jungle. Anxious? Well, that was hardly new. Did she know that Jay was the one that executed the General? Did she know that when he hesitated to pull the trigger it wasn’t out of mercy?
The taut line of his jaw parted just enough to swallow. Golden warmth blossomed from his chest. He took a deep breath. The things he said to Anna Marie were true. He was different. Even compared to a year ago. This power inside, whatever it was, changed people into something else.
Maybe that’s why he couldn’t fault mom and dad’s denial too much. No sane person should covet this power. Let alone witness it infect an innocent girl’s life ahead of her time. Cayli would be better off without this storm blighting her soul.
Only darkness shows you the light.