Ghost of Time

[Nika Raskov]

Liv shifted gears quick enough and Nika wasn’t sure she was making an appropriate face.  “Motherland?”  In fact she looked horrified.  “That place is a death trap…roller coasters?  You’re the one who is crazy.”  Especially if you think they check the torque specs daily…

She found herself nodding along to the mini-tangent until Liv brought it back around.  Nika had never dated anyone who wasn’t at least a little familiar with what she did and how race teams operated.  Was it refreshing?  Kind of?  She didn’t think she could explain anything currently without sounding like a dick though.
  
Liv truly didn’t know what happened in Japan.  That was…weird?  Not that Nika thought she should know but it was strange to go from the blazing spotlight of constant coverage to this closed off little world.  Was that an accurate description?  

The other woman’s hand was a warm contrast to the chill of the glass.  Her concern was not something Nika had had much experience with.  Her gut reaction was to protect Liv.  What?  “Uh…”  There she was again looking horrified and trying to sound reassuring at the same time.  “It’s fine.  Everything is fine.”  Now.  Except you’re still not cleared for the next race.  Another test tomorrow.  Yeah, you’re not going to pass that.  Oh, shut up.  You should have worn a hat.  I’m not supposed to put anything on my head!  Mmhmm, exactly.  “It’s all good, no apologies necessary.”  Nika frowned.  “Why are you apologizing?”

[Liv]

Liv studied Nika- her dimpled smile, her brught eyes- and thought she saw something. Strain. A mask. Did she see it? Or was it something else? Her hand was warm, calloused in places, soft in others. But Liv couldnt shake the vision. Nika, im a bed, tunes hooked up to her. 

It wasn't the Angel's breath, not directly. But still....it was like the dream of them older and a lifetime of love and pain, sorrow and joy. 

Masks. Nika was deflecting. Isn't that what you did? a voice asked her? Acting as if it hadn't hurt, as if she didn't miss Nika, as if she didn't feel bound to her. But how can I say something? She was terrified. Terrified of opening herself. Of taking a chance. Of putting herself out there.

Masks.

Liv took a breath and dropped hers. "I did miss you. It hurt. But I knew I had no right to be hurt. You didn't owe me anything. it came out in a rush. She plunged on. "I like you. And I am scared. Because the last time I did this, I got hurt. Bruises. A broken wrist. The words that stabbed like knives. "But I like you. And I hope this is something.

[Nika Raskov]

Nika didn’t withdraw her hand.  The contact felt good, familiar.  She watched in silence as Liv fought with herself.  She willed the other woman to give her another chance even if she didn’t have a good reason why.  Then, Liv dropped her guard and Nika felt as though she could breathe again.

"I did miss you.”

Her heart soared only to crash just as hard mere moments later.  They might never agree on whether Liv had the right to feel hurt but Nika knew she was in the wrong for disappearing. She knew because of how she felt about Liv.  It wasn’t time to tell her though, that would be crazy.
    
“I am sorry,” she said earnestly.  “I told you at the monastery I’d never hurt you and then I was careless with your feelings.”  Nika’s nearly black eyes bled sorrow before falling to the table.  “I do not want you to be scared ever again.”  Liv should not see how much it pained Nika to know someone had mistreated her.  Nika’s lips compressed briefly before she continued.  Her gaze rose again, calm.  “I…feel as though there is something between us.”  Her expression said she was certain.  “I know there is.”  Her other hand joined Liv’s.  “I’m biased but I'd like for us to continue onward…if it’s too soon though, I understand.”  Nika smiled a little then, a mischievous glint in her eyes.  “I’ll cry, sure, but I’ll understand.”