Need My Fix

[Tatyana]

Tatyana rested her head against one wall of the corner she sat in, keeping her eyes off the Christmas tree. Nox had found people. Tatyana had found Zeke. What little she had, she owed to Zeke. She understood that. Friends with Hayden and Ashton? She was pretty sure Hayden didn’t like her and the only reason he was helping her was because of Nox. It was the same with Ashton.

Her breathing had slowed down as the fog of her eye took effect. The pain was numbed - there, but she couldn’t feel it. That’s what she liked. She wasn’t crying anymore. She just sank into her high. It did things to her. Her mind move slower now, taking more time to process what Nox was saying.

”What?” she asked him quietly. Her words were beginning to slur. ”Oh…Hayden thinks you can help me with my block.”

She didn’t look at him when she spoke. Her eyes remained glued to a spot on the wall. Her hand found the ring in her pocket and pulled it out. She turned her head briefly to look at it. She didn’t put it on, but closed her hand over it. ”Cant use it unless I’m high.” she said closing her eyes.

[Nox]

That was a new one. "I can certainly try."

"So you can touch high, do you feel it otherwise?" Nox wasn't exactly sure how to help but this might actually be a life preservation one that is going to be fireballs. Life and death is always a game changer.

[Tatyana]

Tatyana shrugged. ”I don’t know - I think so…can tell you when my high wears off,” her voice was slowing down. ”Can touch it now though.”

She smiled for the first time that day and found her power. It felt so good within her. She didn’t do anything with it. She felt like it wouldn’t be a good idea with Nox there. Instead she looked over to Hayden holding the baby.

When she spoke it was to Nox. ”Your baby? And the man you love?” she said, recalling what he said earlier.

[Nox]

The distinct feeling of a woman embracing the power sent a tingle down his spine, but she did nothing visible. But then again he didn't know what she could do anyway.

She looked over at Hayden and Lily. "My baby. And a guy I sleep with. Not the guy I love." Though that wasn't the exact truth. Hayden was more than a guy he slept with, he could be more, would not be more but he could have been. It was a part of everything since he was healed that irked him.

The timer dinged and Nox pulled out the food and made three plates. He took one over to Hayden and pushed the other in front of the woman. He took Lily from Hayden when he handed the other man the plate. Hayden gave him a smile. And Nox knew Hayden wanted to talk, he was going to stay until they had a chance to do so. "You went to Juls first I take it and she couldn't help. So you didn't feel it then? Didn't find it?"

Nox perched Lily against his chest with an arm and the power and then started eating while she was cradled against him. She looked up at him with those blue eyes and a happy grin. She wasn't hungry yet, but she would be soon.

[Tatyana]

Tatyana got out of her corner, lured by the food. Hayden was just a man Nox slept with. Tatyana didn’t really have that either. She had slept with people - usually for money to get her fix though. But she didn’t have any of that. She looked at Nox, a questioning look that asked if it was okay to eat.

”No I didn’t,” she said. ”Im not easy to work with when sober. She suggested getting clean and I got upset and gave up.” Tatyana looked down at the ground. Don’t trust people and it makes me not helpful apparently. I don’t like to let people in.” she began to pick at the food in front of her. ”Couldnt focus because could only think about my meds. Want to learn so I can use it in the fights.”

[Nox]

"If you are fixating on getting your fix then of course you aren't going to find it. If you function better while you are high why can't you fight with it? Curious, not judging. I imagine Juls was only trying to help by asking if you wanted to get clean. And it would make touching the power easier if you weren't fixating on something other than the power. It's dangerous to let yourself completely go to the power. Can burn you up if you aren't careful."

Nox smirked. "Most people don't like my methods. It's sink or swim. Life or death. Sometimes they don't talk to me again for a while."

[Tatyana]

She continued to pick at her food, not eating. There was logic in his question. ”I take downers - reaction speed is slower. I can function sober - and can be distracted from the withdrawals when sober - if the distraction is interesting enough. Fighting is interesting enough.” she said.

Sink or swim was normal for her. That’s what her life was. You lived or died. It wasn’t like anyone would miss her if she was gone. She shrugged at his comment. ”Sounds par for the course, and I’m not looking to make friends anyway.” it was blunt, but true. Life was easier without friends.

[Nox]

He understood the not wanting to make friends, he'd spent most of his life like that. "Then maybe you need to change that philosphy. Life is better when you have people to share it with." He knew he sounded like a fortune cookie and he saw Hayden smiling in amusement behind his own plate.

"I see you are on my schedule. Come in sober, we'll meet down stairs and we'll do a little bit of training. Fighting in the dojo. I'll show you some of my tricks not that they'll be helpful for you but maybe you'll figure out your block if I can distract you long enough to find the power. Sink or swim."

[Tatyana]

Tatyana resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the comment about life being better with people to share it with, but she did shake her head at it. One person had always been enough for her. And he was gone. She wouldn’t replace him with another. Sometimes Zeke seemed that way though. She had taken her to Almaz - something her father would have done if he was still alive she wondered at that. Was she replacing her father with Zeke? But as for sharing her actual life - no - she really didn’t do that.

Tatyana finally took a bite of her food, and was surprised at the flavor. It was almost like Hayden’s drink. It was an odd experience after having bland food for so long - and it was good enough for a name. ”Tanya,” she said, taking another bite. One bite had been enough to awaken the hunger in her.

”Okay,” she said after eating a bit in silence. ”Ill come sober and plan it better so that the withdrawals aren’t so extreme either.” the symptoms didn’t come right away. It took time. If she timed it right, she could show up as the high was ending. The focus would be easier then.

[Nox]

Nox offered his name in return and agreed. "Sounds good. Eat now."