Wandering the Kremlin had been boring and Aria found herself back in her room. Sometime that evening Michal came in with a frown. "A moment of your time?" he had asked.

Aria didn't care she hadn't anything else to do. Michal informed Aria of her new task. Seek and destroy. Much like the Regus had sent Aria after the Ascendancy, the Ascendancy had turned the tables on the Regus and sent his own hound after him. It was a poetic sort of irony. But this time things were different. Aria may not be Atharim anymore, but she knew the Atharim. Hunting the Regus would be far easier.

Or so she had thought. The first thing that the ZARS team wanted was the location of the Atharim headquarters. Aria wasn't sure if the Ascendancy knew of the Vatican or not, but she if ZARS went in to Vatican City it would be considered an act of war, it was not part of the CCD. It remained its own entity throughout time. A hollow in the realm that was the CCD.

But she gave the location of the Moscow branch up. Michal had been surprised by it's location and it's proximity to the Kremlin. Aria knew much more about the Baccarat than she was going to tell these agents. If the Ascendancy asked she'd tell him, but she didn't want innocent people harmed because they had funded the Atharim. The Ascendancy wanted to keep them, but that didn't mean you didn't ax the dead weight. Money had to come from somewhere.

The plan was to attempt a small breech. Planning something large scale was going to get a lot of people killed. And you can't run an organization if your followers are dead. So stealth was the name of this game.

Aria hadn't really had time to wonder if the Regus had gotten her credentials revoked. There really was no way to tell without trying. Her wallet had been fried, and she was tasked with this one mission before she was allowed her own freedom - a freedom still grated with finding the Regus, but her life and her home would be her own. Though there was going to be the question of income... But that was a thought for another day.

Michal and two other ZARS agents Aria hadn't bothered to learn their names - not yet anyway - came with Aria to the Baccarat mansion. There was an eerie quiet to the back alleyways. Aria looked up to the fire escape that had led to her own apartment and frowned. Dane was back... She was both elated and frightened by the prospect of finding that familiar calm again. But she knew she would find it - there was nothing more compelling than finding Dane, but work came first.

The smell of stagnate ash filtered through the air. A gust of wind ripped through the alleyway carrying white flakes like snow, but the spring time sky held no winter clouds. The area was devoid of the mass presence of people below. Aria ran to the end of the alleyway that opened up into what was suppose to be the back garden of the Baccarat mansion. Before her where a once massive building stood there was nothing. The blue sky was visible past the mouth of the alleyway and the was nothing but a pile of ash and debris. What had once been a crowning jewel in the Baccarat name was nothing but dust. The Atharim would scatter to the four corners now. Some would return home - but most would go where they felt safest. What had happened? Who had brought the Atharim to their knees? Which question was more important - where was the Regus? or Who had done this?

The place didn't feel of death - the Atharim had survived. Had the Regus? Where would he go? Aria turned down the street back towards the Kremlin. She'd leave a report for the Ascendancy - he could dig up whatever lie beneath if he so desired. But Aria was certain it was all gone. There was no possible way the Atharim would let their home die without a fight.

The memory of the roar of the crowd still sent shivers up Marcus' spine as he dressed, as if the reaction to the Ascendancy's creation of the Arch was merely an appetizer, a prelude to a sumptuous feast.

Bykov and Vladislavovna had seemed overjoyed to find Ascendancy in health, at least in their own way. Neither of them were overly demonstrative unless performing, and their usual reactions always seemed a bit...off. No, not off. Slow, a hair less spontaneous than a normal person. Calculated. Not that most people noticed. But he had. It was something he struggled with as well. This time, though, the enthusiasm and joy seemed more natural. As if there was no attempt at artifice and manipulation.

And he had found it infectious. Especially when they immediately began plotting how to best reveal the Ascendancy's survival and recovery. They had to balance the pragmatic issues of the effect on worldwide markets and potential rebellions with the opportunity to turn a disaster into something truly amazing.

A compromise had been struck, perhaps not to everyone's liking, but such was the nature of compromises. The sea of people in the square dwarfed that from the announcement. This time, there were not shouts of anger or outrage. Instead, from the walls of the Kremlin spilling over into the Basilica and even the GUM, the hum of prayers and the twinkle of candlelight and tear and fear filled faces held vigil. Guards, police and ZARs were out in force but in truth, there was little for them to do. Around the world in other cities, news and online broadcasts showed the same thing. The world held its breath, unsure of what was going to happen next.

The moment had stretched out tautly, drawn to the very last moment it could.

And then Ascendancy had revealed himself, his face larger than life on the monitors- all monitors across the empire, the world- in bars and in squares and in homes and on wallets and tablets and everywhere they could be broadcast. His whole and hale face, body strong and without injury, such a contrast to the burned and nearly dead images that had filled the hearts of so many with fear for the future.

That roar...the thunderous groundswell, the cheering, the unending cheering and cries of joy and elation....Marcus had closed his eyes and reveled in it, felt it wash over him like a wave, fed on it even as he knew it was not his. Not yet. A smile played over his lips, allowed as it fit the mood of everyone. Allowed because one day, one day, this would be his. Consul of the Consulate on Channeler Oversight. Just a name, now, a position. But he would turn it into so much more. This power before him, flowing from the mass of people, he could almost reach out and touch, caress, could nearly see the currents and threads of the souls of everyone out there as they cast their dreams and hopes and joy out into reality and toward the Ascendancy.

On impulse he seized the Force and allowed the dual powers before him to play, wreathing themselves about each other, the two playing and complementing and strengthening and contrasting around him. He could almost visualize a cloak of it surrounding him, a mantle settling up him.

Now, just a few days later, the feeling still remained, lessened with time, it was true. But the memory of it was still strong. He dressed in a wool suit a purple so dark it was nearly black unless hit with the right light. His shirt was a deep forest green and his tie a gold checked pattern, his shoes a supple plum colored leather. But not his Sigma pin. A new stylized image and pin was being commissioned.

Reluctantly, he pushed away the elation. He needed to figure out how to shape his new Consulate. How to structure it. What its goals would be. And how he could use it. He wanted to get out, to gauge the feel of the people. The Force was fresh on their minds, the existence of channelers. He could watch interviews and talking heads endlessly analyze things- as if they knew what was going on or had a pulse on the groundswell. No, he wanted to judge for himself. To see what was needed and what was expected. It was his goal that the Consulate would be as pivotal and important as that of Bykov and Vladislavovna's.

The spring air was crisp and invigorating as he exited the apartment gates. He wanted to see the monument first. There would be where the crowd was most...energetic. Concentrated.


Edited by Marcus DuBois, Dec 1 2016, 05:02 PM.

Evie tapped her fingers against her lips, gazing out at the crowd in the Red Square, dwarfed by the monument. The mood in the hotel room was somewhat tense. When the diplomatic party had set out from DC, their goal was fairly straightforward. The US had a vested interest in ensuring that the CCD didn’t create an army of channelers. (Internally, Evelyn always felt a little giddy at the fact that her term had caught on so well.) They’d carefully gone through the legalese of the various nuclear non-proliferation treaties drafted between their countries over the past century, and created something that read nearly identically, except with individuals rather than missiles.

However, not even an hour into their flight news broke that Ascendancy had somehow suppressed a nuclear bomb, even at great personal cost. That threw a wrench into their plans, to say the least. All the various non-proliferation treaties were based on the presumption of mutually assured destruction. The fact that one side had the power and knowledge to nullify their greatest weapons was… unnerving to say the least. And the fact that Ascendancy had miraculously healed from his grievous wounds in a matter of hours only made things more incredible. Already she had heard whispers from their own aides that the man was a God.

Evelyn had no doubts that Brandon was as mortal as she. His blasphemous declarations of godhood irked her, but Evie had to admit that it also helped her standing tremendously. In her conversation with Nick Trano, she’d told him that a group of unpowered diplomats, no matter how experienced, would have a hard time negotiating with a man who had god-like powers. She’d been proven correct. Ever since news of Ascendancy’s feat broke, they’d been looking at her differently. She doubted that she’d be capable of stopping a nuclear weapon, but the rest of them didn’t know that. The Secretary of State had even admitted to her that he was grateful he had ‘one of them’ on his side. Evelyn had no doubts now that she’d be heavily involved in any negotiations. None of the other diplomats would dare meeting with Brandon face-to-face without her, if only out of fear for the man’s Power.

Evie looked to her right, where her best ally sat. Sofia Castilla was the ranking member of the Senate Foreign Relations committee, and also a Democrat. Congress being split between three major parties made things like committee makeup very interesting. Democrats had a hard time getting legislation passed because the Libertarian and Republican Parties tended to vote more similarly. However, Democrats still controlled a plurality of both chambers, and thus were far from powerless. Sofia wasn’t exactly pro-annexation, but she wasn’t an anti-CCD Republican hawk either. Their opinions on foreign policy matched almost perfectly, and even better, Castilla had made it clear to Evie that she was happy to defer to her judgement on matters of the Power.

Arnold Francis was another story. Getting Secretaries of State past congress was a delicate process for a Republican President. While Libertarians tended to vote with Republicans, foreign relations was one area on which the two Parties diverged. The Libertarian Party was almost isolationist, and so they wouldn’t approve an overly-hawkish appointment. Democrats of course ranged from explicitly pro-CCD to wanting positive relations at the least. Together, Libertarians and Democrats controlled a majority of seats, and could prevent a “bomb them before they bomb us” kind of Republican from taking office. Even so, that didn’t mean that Francis was an ally. He was vehemently opposed to Ascendancy (that was something that the Libertarians and Republicans agreed on), but he wasn’t likely to start a war at the very least. And, Francis had a healthy fear of power. He’d been shaken enough by the thought of Brandon having nuclear-level capabilities that he’d be willing to listen to Evelyn’s advice more often than not.

So in summary, Francis was off balance, and unlikely to seriously oppose any peaceful resolutions Evie could suggest, and Castilla was fully on her side. Evelyn had spent a lot of time strategizing with Castilla, trying to figure out their objectives. Neither woman was naïve enough to really believe that either side would seriously uphold any agreement to curb the use of Power in warfare, but it was the motions that mattered. The US wasn’t strong enough to seriously oppose the CCD, regardless of what Trano thought. It was important for them to find common ground, to create a record of peaceful agreement and coexistence. Her goal was more to open up a path for diplomacy, while staying firm enough to earn Ascendancy’s respect, if not his fear.

Their attention snapped towards the door as a knock sounded. An aide peeked through. “Ah, Sirs and Madams, his Honor the Ascendancy is ready to see you now, if you will follow me please.”

A sense of excitement and trepidation jolted through her, although she ruthlessly allowed none of it to show on her face. This was the moment that Evelyn had been preparing for her entire life. She’d been Chosen for a great purpose, of that she was sure. Whatever plans God had for her, this was where they all began.

The morning after the battle with Regus, Nikolai departed a hospital under the strictest of confidences. The car that carried him back to the Kremlin was completely enclosed before he entered the back seat. His flags bearing the double crescent were absent from the hood. No other ornamentation decorated the vehicle. The only hint that someone important was inside were the blacked out windows, but those were common in a city of billionaires that demanded privacy. It arrived in the Kremlin mid-morning, where he entered the fortress under similar circumstances. The heart of the empire, the Kremlin, had been emptied except for any non-essential personnel or those with the highest of security clearances. Certainly, armed ZARS and Kremlin police were out in force, patrolling on the ground and along the walls, in greater numbers than Nikolai ever recalled seeing. A threat entered the Kremlin last night, and for all they knew, a nuclear bomb had almost turned the city into a smoking crater. As well it might have, if that Ijiraq that stole his power away from him had been able to force him into using it. Nikolai knew his own potential, he felt it stirring when he was delving the reactor in Dayton, Ohio. He could turn the city into a crater if he wanted. Fortunately, Moscow's destruction was not imminent.

In truth, he had let his attackers inside, and confronted them alone. Michael had been unavailable, dealing with the remainder of the Andlain uprising with the ascendants. Alric had been literally thousands of miles away, arriving from DV only hours ago. That left Marcus as his only other powered ally. The boy was strong, Nikolai admitted, and while inexperienced, he proved himself to be loyal. Combined with Aria's alliance, trapping Regus and his second in command should have been easy as a snapping his fingers. However, ancient weapons were not something he'd taken into account. An ijiraq. The memory made him shiver.

He walked the remains of his own apartment in the sub-basements beneath the Kremlin. Dust kicked around his feet. Rebar and a trail of blood snaked the path where a wounded Regus had been dragged before him. More blood stained the floor where he'd been shot and collapsed. More blood splattered where a man had been skewered by a sword, or so he had been told. The sword in question was unaccounted for.

Then there was the spot where the Ijiraq's remains had been recovered. The corpse was taken to the Facility to be dissected and analyzed. Nikolai had every confidence that Captain Weston and her team would be able to tell him something useful to defend against it. Even if it's as trivial a thing as finding out if it was even human.

He considered using his own power to rebuild the bunker. The walls needed reinforced, that was certain, and he did take the time to do as much, if only for safety purposes. But the rest of the architecture remained. He was far more comfortable down here, but it felt wrong to hide now. As he had taken the seat of the Russian tsars upon receiving Ambassador Oakland, he would adopt the living quarters of the mighty dynstasty. The opulent and luxurious tastes were not his, per say, but that was not the point. Like the ruined Arcus band, the point was symbolism.

By afternoon, he was giving his ZARS defenders additional orders to work with Aria. Only she could lead them to the locations that might uncover Regus's whereabouts. He was the top priority at the moment. He and any of his closest allies that posed a threat to him. Aria was found sometime by evening and given permission to formulate a strategy with the team. Together, they were the deadliest force on the planet. He had no doubt Regus would be found soon. Even if they had to use dogs to sniff the trail of his blood. The man would be found and executed.

Nikolai was finally brought up to speed on the affairs of the world in his absence from the lands of the living. With the leak of his injuries and the massive uncertainty his potential death posed, stock markets around the globe plummeted. People were in near panic. If the Ascendancy died, what would become of the CCD? Of course he wasn't dead and he had a plan should it happen, but that plan seemed less and less necessary. With Jensen James under lock and key, any grave injury that befell him again would be healed. Assuming the universe would allow him to die at all.

Security was also becoming an issue. Some of the major cities in DII and DVI were uneasy. Where people gathered in large numbers, even those bringing flowers and lighting candles, unrest followed. A crowd had once again gathered in the Red Square, thousands of people on their knees in prayful bowing for his complete recovery. The walls and the Arch were piled up with flowers and gifts. The Square a sea of flickering candle light.

Then there was news that an American group were in route. Secretary of State and other top officials among them, having been on their way to discuss nuclear policy when the ironic threat left Ascendancy fighting for his life. Between everything, Nikolai made the decision to show the world a miracle that night at sunset.

In the Red Square, where he had stood on the balcony and constructed the Monumental Arch but days ago, he came upon a sanguine crowd. As he had before, he wove the flows to amplify his voice and gather their attention to him as a father gathered his children in tender embrace.

He promised he would protect them. He was their father as this city was their fatherland. He was near death, but he was restored to life by the power he wielded. What they saw of his body being broken was real, and horrifying, but he assured them he was strong as ever before. These threats were going to be eradicated. He would eradicate them. The Custody would be stronger than ever!

After the brief speech, he attended a press conference. True to his word, he was as sharp and strong as ever. He'd showered of course. His eyes were keen and bright. His smile was tempered with confidence and seriousness. The meeting with the press was brief, and he was soon ushered out and replaced by his media Consul for additional information.

Finally, when he ascended to the resting quarters of the palace of the tsars, he relaxed in bed and flipped through images of the holdings in the imperial treasury, seeking out the metal that would become the host of a new Arcus band. He wanted something ready by the time the Americans arrived.

<table><tr>
<td></td>
<td><big>Press Release
from the Press Office of the Holy See</big>
</td>
<td></td>
</tr></table>


For Immediate Release
Contact: Marcello Esposito, Diocese of Public Relations
marcello.esposito@relstat-segstat.va

A Response to Revelations made by His Excellency, The Ascendancy, Nikolai Brandon


His Holiness Pope Patricus and the Holy See extend a warm and comforting hand toward all those who have been stricken with fear and uncertainty after the Ascendancy Nikolai Brandon's recent announcement.

Please be assured that Christ's love, as expressed through the ministrations of the Holy Ghost and through Mother Church, is with everyone throughout the earth regardless of their faith. The appearance of supernatural abilities that has manifested itself throughout the earth has beeen frightening to many.

His Holiness and the Holy See encourage all to see these things for what they are. Yet another example of the myriad wonders of the Lord God our Creator.

His Holiness and the Archbishops of the Holy See will continue to pray and to seek the guidance of the Holy Trinity, the Blessed Mother and of the Saints, as they try to discern the Church's new role in the coming years.

In the meantime, everyone is encouraged to reflect the Spirit of Christ our Savior in showing themselves humble and the servant of all, even as the Our Lord washed the feet of his Apostles while in his Incarnation. Whether low or high, gifted or the salt of the earth, we are but the fingers and hands of the one God who is over all and in all. There is no place for violence or hatred.

We would also extend this gentle reminder to The Ascendancy himself, who has shown through the words and actions of decades the continuing concern for the welfare of the CCD Empire in his heart. The Lord God did indeed call those he has placed in authority 'gods', but only in the most relative sense. It is the fervent hope of His Holiness and of the Holy See that The Holy Trinity and Blessed Mother continue to guide The Ascendancy to be a hand of stability and order to the world in the coming years.



Edited by Regus, Nov 18 2016, 09:38 PM.

Aria plucked at the ill-fitting pants. All her belongings had been in the warehouse except what was deemed unimportant or Asha was using in the small studio apartment she'd started out in. Now all her brand new things were sitting in the basement of the Baccarat mansion where she was certain she was no longer welcome. Nox was probably unwelcome not that she could actually send him a message anyway, she had no wallet.

The weapon the Regus had pointed at her had not only fried her skin, but her electronics. He sword was still missing. Her ZARS handler whose name she found out was Michal, had said the scene was devoid of swords as was the corpse of Martin Barovsky, someone had taken it and Aria intended to find out who. Michael was also the person who had purchased a few changes of clothing once Aria told him of her problem. He had purchased clothes that wouldn't stand out in the Kremlin as easily since that was the place she was staying for the foreseeable future. They didn't fit well but at least they weren't hideous but it still was not something she'd wear on a normal basis. Aria couldn't wait to be out from under the thumb of the stuffy politician types. Though here was far safer than anywhere else until she figured out how much the Atharim knew and who was hunting her.

But the problem with being in the Kremlin was the same as being stuck inside the Bacarrat mansion under house arrest it was boring. Her room was well furnished, there were guest facilities, Aria didn't have any desire to hit the gym. Especially since Jensen James had given her back what Manix had taken.

The feeling of the world crushing her was a welcome feeling. It was home. It was life. It was who she was. She would never doubt the gift she'd been given. Jensen believed if was Gods will. Aria knew better but wished that it was for all that it was worth. But God nor the Atharim would save the world from the war that was going to fall upon this earth. The Atharim were going to reign fiery hell down upon the godlings, and the godlings were going to do the same in return, and all the innocents the Atharim want to save will be caught in the crossfire.

Aria chose to walk the halls of the Kremlin, going where she could, feeling the world around her. The happiness, the frustration, the chaos of everything, and in it all was order. In their feelings she found hope and remembered why the Atharim were created. She had believed in God and the Atharim. The Regus of current had corrupted that belief. She would not hunt gods - not ever. How could she compete with them, why would she want to. They could still be ally's. The monsters will not go away when the Atharim and the godlings destroy themselves - the monsters will remain - someone has to kill them. Use the monsters to hunt the monsters. Aria smiled as she walked in hope - Lucas would be proud. She only had to fight the darkness. The deep penetrating darkness that was like candy to a child. It called to her, beckoned her with blood and fear and death. She would need to hunt again soon that much she knew.

Aaliyah was a natural at thievery. She took to Giovanni's tutelage quickly. That made Giovanni happy at least. He didn't have to waste much time. He learned a lot about her protege.

Aaliyah had been an orphan and clawed her way to wherever she got. She was ambitious and focused working only towards one goal - how she could gain and keep power. She often rode on the coattails of the powerful. It was perhaps the only thing he didn't like about her.

Aaliyah was brilliant, but she had potential for more. She didn't need to ride on anyone's coattails. She could keep and hold power on her own. Giovanni saw it and knew he could use this to his advantage. It would be a mutual partnership.

IN the time he had known her, Giovanni had pursued anymore than a teacher/student relationship. She was very attractive, but there relationship wouldn't ever be romantic. However, they were spending a lot of time together. Surely her current protector was getting jealous. Not that Giovanni cared.

Tonight they were outside the city looking for another mark. It was time to see what she could do.

The last few days passed in a blur of things. Between work and home life Dorian barely had time to think. He'd tried to think down in the tunnels - tried to get his head on straight but duty had called and he'd had to leave. He wondered about the other heat signature. He really should send Nox down below - maybe go with him maybe with Ivan? There was so much to worry about.

Dorian had received a letter from Martin. It turned out the man had made precautions in the event that he had died. He had died. Nox assured Dorian that it had to do with the attack at the Kremlin. He wouldn't elaborate, or he couldn't either way Nox knew little more than Dorian anyway.

The letter was short and very concerning.

Quote:<dl>
<dt>Letter from Martin</dt>
<dd> </dd>
</dl>
Dorian,

I'm sure you've heard the devastating news by now - I am dead. I am not writing to have last words with you of a good nature. My friend, what have you done? I wanted to confront you personally to see that you had not betrayed us. Why did you print the names and addresses of the list of gods and potential gods? Dorian, please tell me you have not sided with them. Someone else will eventually find out. I have not told anyone at the time of my demise. I write this to let you know we are coming for you. You will die my friend for your treachery. Enjoy your family while you have the time. Your days are numbered.

-- Martin

Aaliyah Zevros


The open air market was something most people would expect in Cairo. Shops sold food and other wares in the street. Things had gone back to being relatively normal for the people here despite the conflicts with the Al Janyar group.

Effectively, Al Janyar ran Egypt as well as several other North Eastern African nations. The so called military was unable to keep the group in check. Ibrahim was in charge in Egypt, and as his consort, Aaliyah had a significant influence in the government.

Of course, most people had no idea who she was. She was more like the puppeteer. She pulled strings and things happened. Ibrahim had the final say, but Aaliyah still had his ear. Often, her whisperings became a realization even if it didn't always go her way.

Ibrahim wasn't an ideal situation. Truth be told, Aaliyah didn't like him much, but sharing a bed with him got her what she wanted, and for now that was fine. Who could say how long the Al Janyar would keep his position. It was a tense situation and very little was needed for someone to rise against him within their own organization. It wouldn't matter to her. Another man would rise, and she'd wrap him around her finger as well.

Aaliyah still hated the situation. It was difficult for her to rise in this society. She was a woman in a man's world after all, so she made do. She had so much more potential, however, and craved more.

Today Aaliyah had left Ibrahim's side to get some fresh air. Walking around the market was always somewhat enjoyable. Growing up as an orphan, she had always marveled at the amount of stuff that was in these markets. Of course, that stuff usually ended up in her pockets.

Aaliyah had no need to steal anything anymore. She always got what she wanted, but still she practiced her thievery skills. If she was smart enough to take away another's property and they were stupid enough to not notice, then she deserved it.

Aaliyah looked at an item. A crystalline statue of a scorpion. Aaliyah smiled at it's beauty and waited patiently before pocketing the statue and leaving the area through an alleyway. Another successful thievery.

Nox was out later than she had expected. It wasn't a bad thing, but Elyse fell asleep waiting. She had spent the evening reading this book called The Hobbit. Elyse found herself enjoying the book and had read about half of it before falling asleep. The book sat on the table next to her bed.

Elyse knew she was in the dream. It always felt different than a normal dream. Elyse wasn't sure why she felt this way, but she was suddenly uncomfortable. She usually didn't feel this way in the dream world, but tonight she did.

Elyse stepped forward. Looking around for danger. The dream world in itself was a danger, but now it felt more ominous, but something kept her glued here. There was a reason she needed to stay.

She looked up as something flashed like lightning. There wasn't a cloud in the dream sky, but what she saw made her gasp. The sky appeared to be splitting apart. It was as if the sky was an opening curtain.

Elyse saw a torn, segmented serpent in the opening, and her hand moved reflexively to her mouth. The image faded and rematerialized into a hooded face - fiery blue eyes piercing the darkness. The face itself was shrouded. Once again the image changed - a nest of serpents slithering over tiles. Finally she saw a splash of blood and all was normal.

The environment was normal. At least it was normal for the dream would. Elyse, however, could feel her heart pounding in her chest. Her breathing was heavy, as she stared at the section of sky that had previously been torn - now healed as if nothing had happened.

Elyse's clothing changed as her thoughts flew quickly. With her fear of the Atharim, it didn't surprise her that she had dreamed of snakes, but the dream would didn't behave like this. Something was wrong.

Elyse fell to her knees, wanting to do nothing more than wake up. But feeling at the same time, she couldn't leave.